We have all in one form or the other worked with our cognitive mind and understand that cognition is located physically in our frontal brain at least if not throughout the brain. The grey area remains understanding the nature of our emotional apparatus.
I have come to the conclusion that it is part of the quite separate Vagus nerve system also called our automatic nerve system. The cognitive mind can influence this system but not obviously ignitiate it without effort. It can learn to manage it. That is how cognition gets involved.
Your auto system will send you up a tree upon been presented with a charging grizzly. Your cognitive awareness will then kick in.
Your auto system will trigger anger in its various levels, raging from mild irritation to out of control viking Berserker. Your cognitive system will observe and then perhaps act to temper the effects.
Your auto system will trigger your falling in love whatever the circumstances. Your cognition will then help get you out of the negative effects if necesasary.
Your autosystem will flood or drain your system with *** that are expressed as depression. your cognitive system will then attempt to rationalize the feelings.
You can see the pattern. In fact we learn to apply our cognition to manage the impulses arising from our Vagus nervous system.
Failure to do so is observable and may well indicate mental issues. Anger management is learning to use cognition to control unwelcome impulses.
So where are we going with this. I suggest we neded to make this very natural duality central to all our education and therapeutic efforts.
A person does not choose to become angry. He chooses to indulge it. Thus the natural defination of a master is one who chooses to not indulge such automatic impulses. We largely do anyway but it does need to be polished deliberately.
If we teach folks in this manner, we all may do a lot better at avoiding the promotion of conflict.