This is important and needs to be addressed. We need to understand that all of us are spirit bodies first. We are spirit bodies operating our physical bodies and experiencing life through that. At the same time our spirit strives to advance spitritually and yet must allow decision making to occur through our physical cognitive self as well. That overrides the spirit self during life. It is then easy to understand a sense of dissonance because there is just that.
Yet i also observe that all spirits plot their life story in fair detail before been born. That means picking several potential points of death. It particularly includes picking particular experiences to evolve the soul or spirit.
So a first comfort is simply knowing that you chose this path and asking what is best to do now..